Day After Day
by Mystic Dodo
Summary: It was not good for a relationship when it could be summarised as friends who occasionally had sex. [Puzzleshipping.]
1. Alone

**Day After Day**

**Author: **Mystic Dodo

**Published:** Feb 2015

**A/N:** This is a _multi-chapter fiction_. I haven't done anything like this in a long time!

**Warnings: **Yami has his own body, puzzleshipping (Yuugi x Yami). Watch this space?

* * *

Yuugi loved his friends. Yuugi loved his Yami. Yami enjoyed their friends too.

Oh yes. Yami could understand entirely what Yuugi was doing. He was a people person; he loved being surrounded by loved ones. He loved the laughter, the ease, the jokes, the fun, the comfort… And most of all he loved that he could share that with Yami.

He had his own body. Of course one of Yuugi's first goals – aside from the two committing to a loving relationship that almost felt too good to be true – was for their friends to properly know the former spirit of the Millennium Puzzle. Days out, days in; sleepovers; trips; movies; shopping; gaming… the group of friends were inseparable.

At first, Yami had been flattered. It was fantastic to be included. It was wonderful getting to know their friends on his own, individual basis. It was fun.

Sometimes, though…

Yami sighed. He had just received a message from Jounouchi; _hey, saw Yuugi at work and he said that the gang can come over tonight. Do you have everything that we need?_

That was when he realised he was fed up. Almost… _annoyed_, even. Nonetheless, he replied; _As always. See you all soon._

Don't get Yami wrong. He loved his friends too. He was no way unappreciative of his second chance at life, granted by the Gods. He was thankful for things that he assumed many would take for granted. He appreciated the time that he could spend laughing and playing, debating and talking with the people he had grown even closer to now that he had his own body.

He just wished that it didn't have to impact on his relationship with Yuugi.

It wasn't like they did not communicate with each other, it was more the idea that they had shared a mind for so long that it was easy to assume what the other was thinking and act accordingly. Yami didn't blame Yuugi; Yuugi just wanted to do what he thought was best for everyone. He wanted Yami to feel like he had always been a part of the group; he wanted their friends to feel the same regarding Yami. It was something nobody thought possible.

As Yami greeted Jounouchi, Honda, Anzu and Ryou into his home, he never felt more the stranger.

Yuugi and Yami rented their place soon after high school. It was lovely. It was going to be the two of them, alone, without Jii-chan or Kaa-san or customers at the shop… only, it never really became a place for just Yuugi and Yami. It became The Gangs Place. Pretty much every night at least one of their friends was around. It wasn't like they didn't have the space… It wasn't like Yami didn't have a good time when they did have company. It was just, hard, extremely so, when he couldn't cuddle up with Yuugi and show him affection.

Everyone knew of their relationship; it was common knowledge. Yami had been strange about public displays of affection and Yuugi was never one for it anyway; a hand squeeze, maybe a peck on the cheek if he was feeling daring. In the rare times of privacy they did cuddle and enjoy the occasional romp in the sheets and Yami definitely knew that the two loved one another very dearly. Yet in recent times it now felt like the two soul mates were just friends instead of lovers. It was hard to _be _lovers when people were around constantly and both Yuugi and Yami had settled into habitual roles. A peck on the cheek here, a wink every now and then, mouth on mouth when it was time to go to bed… that was pretty much the extent of their physical relationship.

It left him feeling lonely quite a lot of the time, despite the near constant company that he had.

He wanted _Yuugi._

Just him and his aibou.

It was not good for a relationship when your feelings towards another could be summarised as _friends who occasionally had sex._

Oh, he knew the concept of friends with benefits but he and Yuugi, they had something special. They had something precious and pure. The love between the two was sacred yet he could feel the fires dying.

Everyone had made themselves at home and Yami perched awkwardly on the side of the sofa by the window, keeping a look out for his boyfriends' return from work. Yami couldn't say he was surprised when Yuugi, upon his return, gave Yami a quick squeeze around the shoulders in greeting before busying himself in their friendship group. It was, after all, the standard greeting the two shared but he hated how the habitual contact made his heart clench in his chest.

Yuugi sat next to Anzu on the floor planning the future. He shared jokes with Honda. He and Ryou spoke about the latest games. He and Jounouchi planned food.

And Yami was just, sat on the borders, wondering where he fit in with any of this.

He was…

Not angry. That was too strong of a word. Perhaps sad? Lonely? Disappointed? Bored?

Guilty. Definitely guilty.

Because they were lovers, weren't they? It wasn't _wrong_ to want more affection and time with his boyfriend, was it? He wasn't being selfish for wanting less time with friends because it interfered with time with Yuugi… was he? It wasn't bad to want their space to actually be _that_, right?

Yami knew he was being unusually quiet that evening and when everybody left to go home ("_finally"_ he mentally sighed when the time read 2 in the morning) he wanted nothing more than to curl up in Yuugi's arms, kiss him, perhaps make love and talk about _them._ Yuugi, though, was tired and fell asleep before Yami could finish getting ready for bed.

He couldn't stop the bitter bubbling at the pit of his stomach at thinking that the same old routine would repeat itself tomorrow… and the day after, and the day after.

Friends were a gift, especially ones as loyal as the handful that he had. He loved them. Yuugi loved them. They wouldn't be together if it weren't for them. What could Yami have expected when he gained his own body? Heck, he had been ecstatic at being able to _be_ a real friend. He had _allowed _for things to get this out of control. He had _let_ the relationship between him and Yuugi dissolve into what they had with everyone else; friendship.

How long had it been since they last had a date, with just the two of them?

How long had they sat down and watched a movie in each others' arms?

How long had it been since their talk wasn't dominated by something that one of their friends did or did not do?

How long had it been since the two spent a lazy day in bed with no contact with the outside world, with just each other for company?

He felt so damned lonely, and even with Yuugi fast asleep less than an arm width away from him Yami felt like his smaller lover was so far away.

Yet Yuugi still seemed fine. Maybe things were fine and Yami was expecting too much. Maybe this was how things were in modern days… Maybe he was just being oversensitive and demanding on poor Yuugi who only wanted the best for everyone; who was only being his usual selfless self. The young man certainly wasn't acting like he had a problem with the arrangements. He seemed perfectly content to have things stay the way that they were.

Perhaps… Perhaps Yuugi would preferred it if Yami and him _were _just friends. Yuugi never liked conflict; he hated upsetting anybody. Maybe he had noticed the nature of their relationship but because of his discomfort with negative situations didn't mention when burning love slowly dimmed to simmering embers?

Yami's eyes stung. With a sigh he turned his back on Yuugi and wrapped his share of the duvet around himself.

He couldn't live like this.


	2. Do You Love Me?

**Day After Day  
**

**Published: **Feb 2015

**A/N:** Thank you all so much for the reviews, follows and favs, everyone :) I am going somewhere with this, promise! Also, may I just say that there is not enough Puzzleshipping in the World?!

* * *

It took a few more weeks before Yami got the courage to even somewhat imply his thoughts to his lighter half. He could take on the Shadow Games, sacrifice himself, do goodness knows what but yet there he was, feeling frightened and unsure about talking to someone who knew what he was thinking… some great Pharaoh.

They were walking home from having dinner around Jii-chan's. They walked side by side, not hand in hand, and although the evening was pleasant Yami had felt sick for a majority, neglecting more than half of his food. Yuugi had noticed.

"Mou Hitori no Boku, are you feeling okay?" the shorter of the two asked maybe 5 or so minutes into their twenty minute journey home. The night sky was clear, showcasing a small number of stars that could be seen over the artificial orange light of the street lamps. It took quite a stupid amount of courage to look away from his shifting shadow to lock red with purple.

"Just thinking, that's all. I do not mean to be rude."

"You weren't rude at all, just… uncharacteristically solemn," Yuugi assumed him, linking their arms together. "If there was anything bothering you, you would tell me, right?"

"Of course."

He was rewarded with a smile and he could barely conceal the grimace that crossed his face in return.

Coward. Coward!

It wasn't until they had entered their dark apartment that Yami's courage returned. "I'm sorry, Yuugi."

Yuugi paused halfway through taking off his shoes to glance over at his dark. "Hm? You weren't rude, Yami. It's all okay."

Yami nibbled at his lower lip before opening his arms in a jester for some physical comfort. Yuugi smiled softly and enveloped Yami in his arms. The hug was over far too quickly and Yami's hands helplessly twitched as Yuugi went through the nightly routine of making them both a cup of hot chocolate before bed.

Gods, when did talking to his lover become so difficult? Yami was still beating himself up over the question when Yuugi sat down on the sofa next to him, handing over the milky concoction. He somewhat hoped that Yuugi would try and press the matter of Yami's odd behaviour but he seemed content, as per usual, to sit in silence with a gap between them, absently sipping at his drink.

Yami tried a sip just to give himself something to do with his hands but he still felt nauseous. It was too thick, too sweet, and he pushed it away from him on the coffee table. Was he just being paranoid? Was he just being over sensitive and selfish? Was he just making a big deal out of nothing? If Yuugi – sweet, thoughtful Yuugi, who would always tell if something was wrong with somebody before they even came to the conclusion themselves – could not see that something was amiss then, well, was there anything?

But yet, as Yami leaned back on the sofa, he brushed against Yuugi's torso and he darted away as if he was burned. His heart was thudding loudly and he froze. That reaction definitely wasn't normal. Why was he hesitant about them touching? Had their relationship deteriorated to the point where he wasn't sure if Yuugi would appreciate some closeness? He seemed okay with the hugs that Anzu gave him…

Oh Ra.

When Yuugi finished his mug of cocoa with a satisfied sigh and made to get up, Yami once again paused in getting his attention.

"Don't stay up too late, okay?" Yuugi told him with a smile, standing at the bottom of the stairs. He turned and Yami suddenly felt like if he didn't say anything, _do_ anything, in that particular moment then he would lose Yuugi forever.

"A-aibou?"

His voice was thick and he cleared it awkwardly when Yuugi returned his gaze to Yami's figure. "Hmm?"

"I… Do you think…" Gosh, since when did he stutter? He took a deep breath, sat up straighter and met Yuugi's eyes dead on. "Are things okay between us?"

Yuugi stepped down from the step he had taken and tilted his head at Yami's question, looking confused. "Of course, Mou Hitori no Boku. Why do you think they're not?"

"Are you happy?" he asked instead, hating how his hands shook beside his thighs.

Yuugi took a few more steps forward, his confusion turning to concern. "Have I given you the impression that I'm not?"

"Please, Yuugi. Just, a yes or a no," Yami croaked, his confidence quickly failing.

"Yes. Are _you_ happy?"

And it could have been over and done with like that. Yuugi thought things were fine so they must be. Yami was being silly. Yami could easily shake the conversation off and follow Yuugi to bed… where they would fall asleep and wake up and their friends will be around and… and…

"Not particularly," the words were vomited from Yami's mouth before he could truly think about what he was saying.

At Yuugi's shocked blink Yami looked away, clenching his fists and glaring at some poor part of the sofa as though hoping to set it on fire. Things were silent; too silent. Yami couldn't hear a thing, not even Yuugi's gentle breathing. He almost wanted to bulk when he finally heard movement and Yuugi knelt on the floor in front of Yami. A gentle hand reached up and guided Yami's face towards Yuugi and Yami hated himself; Yuugi's beautiful face was contorted in pain.

"Yami?" Yuugi whispered softly, hand dusting his cheek.

It was automatic to reach up and press his hand closer to his face, nuzzling against the palm and feeling his tough Pharaoh demeanour crumble. For the first time in what felt like far too long his eyes filled with tears and Yuugi was softly stroking his cheek bone, his anxious look never faltering on his face. After a few moments, Yuugi breathed his name again, the unsaid question hanging between them.

"I love you," Yami's low voice leaked over the silence. He needed Yuugi to know that. He _had_ to. But the tear that was being held back by his eyelashes fell and he knew it must look terrible for Yuugi, proclaiming his love but crying like there was a "but" coming along. His shoulders shook when he bitterly corrected himself in his head; there was a _but…_ It was a testament to Yuugi's strength that he was the one who gently prompted for more details, his gaze never leaving Yami's face. His hand was trembling slightly and his eyes glassy but he didn't act hysterical and Yami didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

"What is making you unhappy, Yami?"

Yami swallowed thickly. "It doesn't feel like we're in a relationship."

And saying the words out loud, admitting his fears, seeing Yuugi's shocked face in the dim light of the night with nothing but a lamp illuminating the scene, made it all the more real and Yami hiccupped, moving away from Yuugi and sitting further back on the sofa with his knees to his chest. Yuugi's hand was still in the air and he could hear his boyfriend take a shaky breath before he moved to sat on the sofa next to Yami. "Do you want to be with me?" Yami blurted out to stop Yuugi from advancing further.

"Yes. Yes. Of course I do. I love you."

"But you don't act like it."

Yami could feel hurt and fear combining with anger; a defence mechanism, and he glared at Yuugi from under his eyelashes. His hands were pinching into his own arms. He hated this. He hated the wounded look that Yuugi was giving him, like he couldn't quite believe what he was hearing. He hated like Yuugi was acting like he didn't _know_ that there had been a problem because he was so _optimistic_ and a _dreamer_ and… and he knew he was being unfair because Yuugi was anything but. He was a scared, shy, insecure individual who only wanted what was best, he never meant for any of this to happen; he cared for everyone, he wanted everyone to be happy but, Ra damn it, Yami wasn't and _why was Yuugi behaving like Yami had done something terrible?_

"Would you…" Yuugi licked his dry lips, amethyst eyes still glassy with unshed tears. "Would you like to explain what makes you believe that I don't love you? Please, help me understand. Where has this come from?" his voice lowered to a whisper at the end and Yami hated himself for being angry because he was hurting his light.

"It hurts," Yami mumbled in an equally low voice, refusing to look at anything but the hunched over form of his lover, "the way you don't pay me attention."

"What do you mean?"

"It doesn't feel like we're in love. It feels like… it feels like we're just people who live together that infrequently has sex," Yami spat. "We never spend time together. Our friends are always here. When we are together you're always talking with them with texting or phone or whatever. It's never just _us._ Gods, we barely hug let alone kiss. It's… like I don't exist to you. I'm just _there_ as some damned ornament, as a figment of your mind."

Yuugi opened and closed his mouth a few times, a frown beginning to shadow his face. It gave Yami a sick sense of satisfaction to have dumbfounded his lover in such a fashion; an illusion of control, of dominance. A façade of Yami being able to metaphorically stand up tall when all he wanted to do was break down and beg Yuugi to love him, _love_ him and _mean_ it.

"It… feels like you have been the one distancing yourself from me," Yuugi finally managed to say.

"_How?"_ Yami snapped before taking a deep breath to try and reign his frustration.

Yuugi shrugged uncomfortably. "I don't know. You just, don't ask for anything. You accept things as being as they are. You haven't mentioned any displeasure before this. I thought, maybe, you just… I don't know. You realised that you didn't love me as much as we initially thought."

"So you choose to let things disintegrate?"

Yuugi glared at Yami for his choice of words, anger seeping into his voice. "You're the pot calling the kettle black. Why didn't you say anything to me sooner?"

"Why didn't you say anything to _me?"_ Yami demanded. "I'm not in your mind anymore, Yuugi. Just because I used to be doesn't mean I know every thought that goes through your head; there have been so many times I question your motives and your thoughts because they don't make sense to me and that _was_ when we shared the mind link. What makes you think I will continue – or even improve – to understand when we're separate?"

Yami uncurled himself as Yuugi took a few measured breaths. "Perhaps I have been assuming," Yuugi eventually bit out. "In a way, I was used to you _having_ to do what I went with because you had no choice. But you _do_ have that choice, now, Yami. You do. You are your own person and you have the right to say something if you aren't happy about it. You have the power to change things, now."

"That's what I want to do," Yami sighed, the fight leaving his body. He slumped back against the sofa, nibbling at the corner of his lips. "I want things to be different."

"Then tell me," Yuugi implored softly.

Yami risked a sideways glance towards Yuugi, who looked far too tense in the minimal light. "You might not like what I have to say," he warned.

Yuugi gave a curious sound, between a sob and a chuckle, before he replied. "I don't think anybody likes to hear that someone they love is breaking up with them but-"

"Wait, break up? You think I'm breaking up with you?" Yami was shocked and he couldn't help the breathless laugh that escaped his tight chest. "Aibou, no. I want us to be together. That's the problem."

"How is that a problem?" Yuugi asked, exasperated. "I don't understand."

"Because you act like you _don't_ want us to be together," Yami cried out. "Where is the affection? Where is the love? Where is the intimacy?"

Yuugi's face twisted in the most unbecoming expression. "Sex? This is about sex?"

_"No!"_ Yami face planted his hands. "You aren't _listening_, aibou."

"And you're not making any sense!" Yuugi snapped in retaliation. He ran a flustered hand through his hair. "Help me out here."

"I want _you._ I want _us._ I don't want our friends around every waking minute. I want you to pay some damned attention to me, like I matter to you! I want us to be a _couple."_

The silence that exploded after Yami's outburst was deafening. Yuugi's mouth was slightly open, shocked marring his features, his shoulders tense. He blinked a few times before heaving himself up from the sofa and pacing aimlessly around their living room. A few minutes passed and Yami was about to give up when Yuugi spoke again, a forced calmness to his voice.

"So what you are saying is that I am not giving you enough affection?" he tested the words carefully. "That you feel like I pay too much attention to our friends?"

"Yes."

"Okay," Yuugi sighed. "Okay." He returned to the sofa and sat down gingerly at the edge. "I think I can see where you're coming from… yet I have only been acting the way that I have because I thought it was what you wanted." He held up a hand, interrupting Yami before he could utter a sound. "You haven't expressed any desire for us to be alone. You haven't voiced any… disagreement about the amount of time we spend with our friends."

Yuugi was correct in that statement and Yami licked his lips, not knowing how to respond. "I suppose," he tried, "I didn't say anything because you didn't say anything." And it felt quite good to share a nervous giggle with his partner, somewhat dispelling the tense air. "We shared a mind for years yet haven't been able to communicate this," he continued, trying to keep his tone lighthearted and non-accusing. Yuugi giggled again, breathless like he had just sprinted, and he eased himself into the sofa.

It was silent for a few more minutes.

"Have… I really given you the impression that I didn't love you?" Yuugi asked softly, hands nervously twisting in his lap. "Have I really been that neglectful?"

Yami swallowed, heart uncomfortable in his chest as he reached out and placed a hand on Yuugi's knee. "You aren't to blame," he assured him quietly. "I should have said something sooner."

"Well, I do agree with that," Yuugi's half grin was more of a flinch than anything else, "but I should have noticed that you were unhappy with how things were. I'm sorry, Mou Hitori no Boku. What can I do to make this up to you?"

"What can _we_ do," Yami correctly. "Again, you aren't the only one who has messed up." His skin tingled when one of Yuugi's restless hands intertwined with one of his own. "I do love everything that you have done for me; trying to make me feel included. I do enjoy the time with our friends as well." Absently, his free hand reached out and covered the hand already on top of his. "I just…"

"You want to feel like you're loved?" Yuugi tried to finish for him. The shadows from the dim lamp made him look tired and Yami felt the guilt return.

"I want to be able to kiss you," Yami whispered. "Not just as a greeting or a goodbye but because we can. I want to be able to cuddle you for extended periods of time. I want us to spend time getting to know one another again."

He couldn't say that he was surprised when Yuugi's glassy eyes began to trickle tears. He was, however, a little bit caught unaware when Yuugi threw himself into Yami's chest, holding on in a grip that was almost suffocating. "I'm so sorry," Yuugi gulped against him. "I never mean to hurt you. I love you so much and, and, and to be honest I've been wanting us to feel more like a couple as well. But you seemed so distant and I felt lonely so continued to invite our friends over and it only made the situation worse and I should have known something was up. I'm sorry, I'm sorry –"

He was crying too hard to continue and Yami folded his arms around Yuugi's frame, his hands splayed openly on the slender body of his lover. They hadn't been so physically close in what felt like weeks and he shouldn't have felt pleased at how this outcome had happened yet he did. He could breathe in Yuugi's shampoo and feel the slight ridges of bone underneath the clothing, and the hot gusts of air against his neck was making his skin tingle.

Yami inhaled shakily and held Yuugi close, ignoring the tightness that was beginning to make itself known in his trousers. They were in no such emotional or mental state… and it was so _late_. His own eyes were stinging with fatigue and he knew that Yuugi would fall asleep on him as soon as his crying spree was over. Yami bit his lip before making up his mind, picking Yuugi up bridal style and taking them to their bedroom.

"Yami –"

"Shh, aibou," Yami soothed, wiping some moister off Yuugi's face. "We should sleep."

"But –"

"Tomorrow, okay?" Yami promised softly. "Rest now."

"I love you," Yuugi mumbled, already losing grips on consciousness. And Yami felt his heart leap at the words, whispering them in return to the man that was already sleeping.

Things weren't fixed but they should be… soon.


	3. Gotta Talk To You

**Day After Day**

**Author: **Mystic Dodo

**A/N:** Here is a snapshot into Yuugi's mind!

* * *

When Yuugi woke up the next day, his eyes felt puffy and gritty. It took a few moments to remember that he had fallen asleep crying after his boyfriend, the man that he adored above all else, thought that Yuugi didn't love him. His head was pounding and his chest ached. How? What? Why? When?

Shifting over in bed with a soft moan, Yuugi nearly headbutted Yami who was still fast asleep. Odd... usually Yami was an early riser. What time was it? It nearly made Yuugi flop back into bed with exasperation when he saw that the digital clock declared it to be just shy of 6am. He never woke up that early!

Despite trying, though, Yuugi couldn't fall back to sleep. He felt sick and bits and pieces of the previous nights' confessions ran through his head. Restlessness eventually made him creep out of bed and he sat downstairs with a cup of tea, reflecting on his actions over the past few months. Surely he hadn't been neglecting Yami that much, had he? Definitely not enough for Yami to feel like Yuugi no longer loved him. They did spend quite a bit of time together, despite Yami's beliefs that they didn't.

Frowning into the cup, Yuugi sighed. Ah, he knew what it was.

For a while after their separation, it was nigh on impossible to separate the two. Yuugi and Yami were joined at the hip. Yami tended to panic when Yuugi wasn't around. It was partially due to this that Yuugi decided to not go to college, instead finding a small place for the two to rent so that the two could be together while Yami became more accustomed to modern living. It was close enough to the Kame Game Shop so that Yuugi could do shifts as well as look after Grandpa when necessary, but it also gave the two young lovers their space to explore many different aspects of their relationship.

Yuugi flushed at the memories, a small smile tugging at his lips. Oh yes, they had been inseparable for a while.

Jounouchi and the rest of the gang eventually managed to pry the two away from their little haven, wanting to know the Spirit in a more personal level as well. Plus, Anzu had reasoned, it wasn't healthy for Yuugi and Yami to continuously be together. Yami would never get over his separation anxiety, otherwise.

Once again, Yuugi sighed, feeling frustrated at himself. He thought Yami had managed to deal with the anxiety of being apart from Yuugi. Obviously not, if his recent behaviour and the conversation last night revealed anything. Why hadn't he noticed anything sooner? Perhaps, in a way, he had been too focused on their friends. Honda and Anzu were at college and Jounouchi managed to get an apprenticeship at Kaiba Corp of all places... in a way, perhaps Yuugi was living through his friends; although he never knew what he wanted to do after school, working for Kaiba Corp would have been amazing. Studying game development would have been fascinating as well. Instead he gave it up to babysit Yami.

No. No, that was wrong to say. He gave up college to make sure Yami wasn't lonely.

Yet he still was anyway.

Irritation at himself melted into exasperation at Yami. He had too much time on his hands. It wasn't fair for Yami to expect Yuugi to spend every waking moment with him. Yami had a life, now. He spent it at home, constantly messaging Yuugi and demanding his attention. He understood that Yami faced many difficulties but Kaiba had forged documents that made it seem like Yami Sennen had been born a year before Yuugi, of Japanese and Egyptian decent. They weren't related despite their similar looks. Yuugi didn't really understand how Kaiba had managed to pull it off but Yami had a believable back story as to why he suddenly appeared into Yuugi's life, but Yami had transferable skills that could be used in a work place. Leadership, team work, tutoring in history... yet Yami didn't do anything with these skills. Grandpa had offered more than enough times to give Yami a job at the shop.

Yami was being ridiculous. He needed to get a job, stop stewing in his own thoughts and not be so demanding of Yuugi.

Yuugi loved Yami, more than he ever thought was possible, but he had been far too lenient with Yami's clingy behaviour.

Nodding his head to himself, Yuugi quickly downed his cold cup of tea and sent quick messages to their friends about his plan.


End file.
